When You Walk Through A Storm

So... apparently my part of England is being savaged by a storm at the moment. I wouldn't know, because I'm still safely tucked up in bed. But it sure sounds windy outside.

And as I'm sitting in my little bubble, I'm thinking about how storms in life come in many different shapes and sizes. Some are in the form of weather, and can be mostly avoided by hiding in your room until it's passed, but others are harder to get away from. There can be all sorts of unexpected situations that suddenly pop up and blow us away.

That's the funny thing about it. Until Saturday, unless the weathermen were keeping it a secret, nobody knew this storm was coming. A lump of cloud down near America got caught by a freak current and whooshed off to our side of the world. Or that's how I understand it, at least.

Sometimes it happens like that. You can be sailing along quite happily through a perfectly normal week and then BOOM, the storm hits. It could be a routine hospital appointment, an unexpected phone call, a letter from the bank. And suddenly your life is thrown into chaos.

So what can you do, to prepare for a storm that you don't know is coming?
And when the storm hits, how do you ensure you come out the other side as quickly and safely as possible?

When I'm faced with things I can't do myself, I try to look for someone who can. For example, I don't have a driving license. Or a car. Or a bike. So if I want to go somewhere more than a couple of miles away, I have to rely on someone else to get me there.

Similarly, when a storm hits my life, or the life of someone close to me, there's often very little I can do about it. So I look for someone who can. I heard about this guy who calmed a storm once. I reckon he might be worth a call.

That's what I do anyway. 
When I'm battered by the hurricanes of life, I lean on Jesus. 
I find he usually gets me through.

What Am I Doing With My Life?

So this is my 20th blog post. That's pretty cool.
Maybe when I'm a bit more awake I'll feel excited about that.

It's been a bit of a manic week this week, with unexpected things happening left right and centre. The sort of week that makes you question who you are and where you're going and what it's all about. In short, 
"What am I doing with my life?"

Conveniently, I already asked God this very question when I was on holiday in August.

The thing is, in life, we tend to get very busy very quickly. At that time I had a lot of different projects going on. A range of things that I was doing for myself, for other people or for God. And I'd got so caught up in doing all these things that I'd lost sight of the bigger picture. I couldn't remember why I was doing any of it any more or where I was going.

So I sat down, on the last day of camp, and asked God,
"What is it that You want me to do with my life? Which of these projects do You want me to pursue? Which, if any of them, is my Calling?"
(Your Calling being The Thing that your life is For)

And His response surprised me:

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart,

with all your soul and with all your mind.

Love your neighbour as yourself.

Do this, and the rest will follow."

That's it. That is all I have to do. Just love.

At this point I think I need to clarify what loving means. Love is not just sitting around gazing into space and experiencing warm fluffy feelings. It's not even sitting there spouting reams of beautiful poetry about your love (though that wouldn't go amiss). Love is a verb in the strongest sense. It is not an emotional state but an active, effort-requiring, get-up-and-do-things verb. Sometimes loving God means putting your own desires second. Sometimes loving people, forgiving the brokenness, trying again, is hard work. Love is not easy. But it is what is required of us.

Sometimes, we get lost in the busyness of life. We forget the purpose of it all. But Jesus was clear what the greatest commandment was.

In my life, I have two jobs:

1. Love God
2. Love people

Because in the end, that's what everything boils down to.

Waiting for Sunrise

I am so tired this morning. I can barely keep my eyes open. It didn't help that I had to wake up when it was still dark outside. I hate that feeling, in winter, when you get up in the dark and you come home in the dark and it feels like you might never see the sun again. Especially at the beginning, when the memories of the summer are still fresh in your mind and they seem a long way off from returning.

I feel like that spiritually at the moment, as well. A few months ago, everything was going swimmingly. I was on fire for God and we were doing amazing things together and it felt like we were unstoppable. And then it stopped. Not stopped altogether, but the deluge of great stuff has dried up a lot. Things just aren't running as smoothly as they were.

It's tempting to fear, when we're stuck in dark times, that the sun might never come back. What if it stays winter forever? What if I have to stay blundering about like this for the rest of my life? What if this is as good as it's ever going to get? Then we may as well give up now. If the problem you are struggling with will never be resolved, if the project you're working on will never be restored, what's the use in persevering?

But contrary to popular belief, that's not how are universe works. The planets spin and revolve around the sun at a more or less constant rate, and have been doing so for a very long time. Therefore it is reasonable to assume that they will continue to do so. Night will become day and winter will turn into summer. We just have to be patient.

Sometimes, waiting for God to answer our prayers is hard. Sometimes, we call out to him in the dead of night, and it is hard to trust that the morning will come. But it will. Our God does not disappoint and His love never fails.

In the words of Les Miserables,
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise.

There's No Me Without Me (And Other Uncomfortable Truths)

You know sometimes, when someone is really annoying you, you just want to spend a few days as far away from them as possible, not talking to or thinking about them at all, until you get over how annoying they are? That's how I felt about myself last night.

I can be really irritating. It's part of my bubbly personality that I can grate on people after a while. But that wasn't what was bugging me last night. It was the fact that I know one thing to be true, but act as if it's the opposite. I know what I want to do and think but that's not how my thoughts and actions turn out. Most of all, I am a massive hypocrite.

Here is a list of things I believe, that shape how I feel and act towards other people:

• All people are made by God, in His image, and therefore have intrinsic value.
• All people are special in their own unique way, according to how God has made them.
• No person is any more important or any less important than anyone else.
• All people make mistakes. But God has forgiven them, so I should too.
• All people are known and loved by God, who is the only person capable of deciding if they are worth it.

But it seems to be one rule for me and another for everyone else. Why is it that I so easily see the best in others, but the worst in myself? If I truly believe those things to be true, why can't I apply them to myself?

My lack of self-belief was what was annoying me last night. But I hereby make a declaration that the following things are true:

• I am made by God, in His image, and therefore have intrinsic value.
• I am special in my own unique way, according to how God has made me.
• I am no more important, but also no less important than anyone else.
• I make mistakes. But God has forgiven me, so I should too.
• I am known and loved by God, who is the only person capable of deciding if I am worth it.

Yes I know it's important to be humble and have a realistic idea of your faults, in order to improve yourself and so on. But it is equally wrong to have an overly negative view of yourself. The enemy would have us believe we are worth less than other people, and somehow less important to God. But He made the Heavens and the Earth and everything in it. He created the sunset, the tulips, and you.

Here is a list of truths about you:

• YOU are made by God, in His image, and therefore have intrinsic value.
• YOU are special in your own unique way, according to how God has made you.
• YOU are no more important, but also no less important than anyone else.
• YOU make mistakes. But God has forgiven you, so you should too.
• YOU are known and loved by God, who is the only person capable of deciding if you are worth it.

Self-hatred is not humility. It is disapproving of this cool thing that God has made. He thinks you are pretty awesome. Who are you to disagree?